Fake it Till You Make it

They know who you are, you should too.

Who can it be now?

From students to CEOs, artists to scientists, and everyone in between, there’s a nagging voice that has spoken up within all of them at one time or another. 

Imposter syndrome.

We’ve all heard the term, accused others of having it, and more often than we may care to admit, feel like we’re the biggest imposters of them all. Don’t worry, it’s common. That being said, if it goes unchecked, and left to its own devices, it may very well hold you back from living the life you were meant to live. 

Although not considered a mental health disorder, imposter syndrome is widely described as a psychological phenomenon, where despite evidence to the contrary, people feel less than worthy of their lot in life. Think of it as self doubt on steroids. Ignore it and it could cripple you.

Embracing negative aspects of who we are, although difficult, is imperative if we want to navigate away from the feelings of inadequacy that imposter syndrome provides and start figuring out the path to acceptance. This might be a good time to lean into the “fake it til you make it” mantra, but more on that a little later.

“Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.”

— Suzy Kassem, Poet

Winning is for other people

Imposter syndrome was first studied by researchers Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Ament Imes in 1978. Their research observed 150 women, all respected professionals with PhDs or students with exceptional academic achievements. 

Most of the participants, regardless of how often they were praised or reached multiple levels of success, felt as though they weren’t as smart as others perceived them to be. They thought their achievements came to them by dumb luck, and somehow managed to fool those around them into believing they were better than what they actually were. 

Talk about self doubt or taking on the persona of intellectual fraudulence. These feelings are big and they are not very easy to defeat. There’s nothing wrong with a little bit of luck and being in the right place at the right time, but the women in this initial study were successful based on merit, not luck and not timing.

They just couldn’t see it.

“Not only can imposter syndrome affect your internal feelings about work or self-worth, but it can also affect the way you approach projects, relationships, or any other areas in which you are feeling insecure.”

— Hannah Owens, LMSW

Enough is enough

Why should we “Fake it til we make it?” Isn’t that a bit disingenuous? Faking something implies that we don’t know what we’re doing and/or that we’re not smart enough to figure it out. So instead of facing that abysmal truth, just fake your way through it. Right?

It’s not that cut and dried. 

What’s truly ironic about dealing with imposter syndrome is that the people who feel it the most are unusually highly accomplished, impressive individuals. If you think about it, it makes a lot of sense. 

It’s difficult to feel the need to fake something if people aren’t looking to you for help, guidance, or answers in the first place. The reason people are seeking you out for all of that is because they know you have a level of knowledge or understanding of the topic at hand that they do not have. You are who they need. They know it and you should too. 

This is what makes imposter syndrome such a challenging psychological phenomenon.

According to Dr. Valerie Young, an internationally recognized expert on imposter syndrome and co-founder of Impostor Syndrome Institute, there are five basic types of imposter syndrome. 

The 5 Types of Imposter Syndrome:

• The Perfectionist: This involves that, unless you were actually perfect, you could have done better. You feel like a fake because your perfectionist traits cause you to believe that you’re nowhere near as good as others think you are.

• The Expert: Although you’ve worked hard to earn the title, you know that you don’t know everything there is to know about a particular topic or that you haven’t mastered every step in a process. You understand there is more to learn so you cannot accept the title of “expert”. This will have you chasing your tail forever.

• The Natural Genius: You believe that competence should come easily, naturally. If you find something to be difficult or challenging you start to feel inadaquete.

• The Soloist: You think that asking for help is a sign of weakness and that you should be able to accomplish any task on your own. 

• The Superperson: You are always trying to prove your worth so you work longer and harder than those around you. This inevitably leads to burnout and stress because you’re focusing too much on others and not what you need to do for yourself.

Why me?

As with most disorders, we look for answers and reasons as to why we’re affected by imposter syndrome. Why me? What did I do wrong? What did I do to deserve viewing myself as less than? 

Although the questions are fair, they do not help us get to the real root of the problem and tackle it head on. Instead, they feed the beast that constantly puts us down, not allowing us to go forward and better ourselves. 

Be that as it may, there are some explanations as to what causes imposter syndrome. Knowing the real reasons, not the ones filled with self doubt and self sabotage, are important steps toward learning how to defeat imposter syndrome once and for all. 

Childhood upbringing - Children who were raised with an emphasis on intellectual sibling rivalry, achievement, or comparisons, may believe that love and support are contingent upon great success. Praise, either too much or too little, not given in a consistent manner may cause self-doubt later on in life. 

Societal pressures - Gender-based roles, cultural expectations, or glorifying “effortless success”, all play roles in some people developing imposter syndrome. 

Workplace - Careers can be inherently competitive and how that environment is managed can go a long way in whether or not some people experience imposter syndrome. A toxic, hyper-competitive workplace, a lack of mentorship, and no, or poor feedback systems, will likely foster a breeding ground for imposter syndrome to set in. 

It’s time to take the wheel

You are successful. You’re worthy of praise and have many accomplishments to prove it. Being caught under the spell of imposter syndrome is frustrating and can make you feel imobile.

You are not alone.

Do you know how I know that you’re not alone? I’ll tell you.

I’m an imposter!

See, I told you I know. Now, that sentence may be a bit misleading as I do not view myself as a fake or a phony during all of my waking hours, that would be an issue. What I can tell you, though, is that I suffered from severe imposter syndrome while starting this business.

Despite earning numerous degrees, including a doctorate, and amassing multiple certifications in several disciplines, I felt like I was not qualified to start this business. I’ve held positions of power at top levels, had teams of employees report to me, and kicked proverbial ass like a boss, and yet couldn’t find it within myself to believe this could work.

My wealth of experience and knowledge be damned! I’m just going to fake it til I make it because who do I think I am? 

I’m telling you this because it’s true and to let you know that I understand what you’re going through. I’ve dedicated myself to pushing the imposter within me away while helping you do the same. 

We are not alone!

It is estimated that at least 70% of people will have at least one run-in with imposter syndrome during their lifetime. Some struggle with it longer than others however and that can lead to depression, anxiety, and other behavioral health concerns. It’s not to be taken lightly.

Once you recognize, or even if you suspect that you might be dealing with imposter syndrome, (and if you can’t just “fake it til you make it”), there is hope. 

Talking to a friend and letting them know that you feel this way is a great first step. Acknowledge and validate your feelings but know that they are temporary. Set realistic standards for yourself and understand that there is no such thing as perfection. Celebrate your accomplishments instead of judging them. Enjoy what you’ve earned.

Final Thoughts

Imposter syndrome is a widespread, yet often invisible dilemma. You know you’re in a battle but others may not have any clue. This is the time to “Fake it til you make it”. 

Don’t think of “faking” as a negative connotation. It isn’t. Look at it as though you’re “practicing” instead. You already have the skills, the knowledge, and the wherewithal to succeed, but just because you haven’t given yourself the credit for it yet, do not deprive others of the help you can offer. 

Imposter syndrome isn’t just a barrier to success, it can also be viewed as evidence that you’re growing, evolving, and stepping outside of your comfort zone. This is not a weakness, it’s a transformation. Take it as such and your perception of the world, and your place in it, will begin to show endless possibilities. 

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